Thursday, March 23, 2006




Yes, this is Roberto speaking.

Hi Roberto, this is Corrine Walters. I have a puddle by my front door.

Hi Mrs. Walters how are you? You have a puddle by your front door?

I’m fine but every morning when I go outside there is a big puddle right by the front gate.

It has been raining a lot in the last few days Mrs. Walters.

Yes I know it has been raining but I don’t think…could you hold on I have another call.

Ok…..Lord grumble grumble



I think the puddle is coming from one of the sprinklers. Could you please check it out and fix it. I have to sweep the water away every morning. There is a big puddle there by the gate at the front.

Did you turn the sprinklers off when it started raining?


Could you turn the sprinklers off and see if there is a puddle there in the morning?

I don’t know how to work the sprinklers. Oh I have another call……


Roberto I am going to take a picture of the puddle with my phone and e-mail it to you.

That isn’t necessary Mrs. Walters. How long has this puddle been there?

It’s been there every morning for over a week. I can see where it runs down the driveway. It must be one of the sprinklers. I need to have it fixed now. I have company in the morning. I won’t have time to sweep the puddle in the morning. Oh excuse me my Google search is coming up on the phone now……………………..So can you come over and fix it today?

Can I have you just shut off the irrigation system until I get there on Thursday?

I don’t know how any of that works. I don’t know what to do. Could you just come and see what’s wrong. I need it fixed by the morning. I have an important video conference call set up and people are coming here in the morning.

It is really very simple. I can tell you how to shut the ….

Hold on my DVD just finished copying, hold on just a second……….. I’m back Roberto.

I can tell you how to shut the irrigation system off. With all this rain it should have been shut off anyway.

But there is a puddle by my front door and I need that fixed.

If the water is from the sprinklers and we shut the system off there won’t be a puddle there in the morning.

But I don’t know how it works. Can’t you just come by and fix it. There is a puddle by the front door that I have to sweep every morning.

Are you sure I can’t just tell you how to shut it off?

It’s too complicated. I don’t know how that kind of stuff works. I wouldn’t be able to figure it out.

It’s really very simple.

Please Roberto. I really need it fixed now. I have to get my TiVo programmed today so I don’t miss my shows tomorrow.

All you have to do is turn a knob.

I wouldn’t know which knob to turn. Please Roberto can’t you just come fix it. There’s a puddle….

Fine! I will be over later this afternoon.

Oh thank you Roberto. Gotta go. My other phone is ringing. Bye.

X!@C^M&%K/” Mrs. Walters grumble grumble Aaarggghhh!

Roberto pulled his truck into the drive around 3:30 that afternoon. He was tired but it was still early enough that he figured he might as well turn the sprinklers on and see if there was a problem. Mrs. Walters came out the front gate as he was getting out of his truck.

Hi Roberto. The puddle is right here every morning. See this spot. See where it runs down the drive to this spot.

I will turn the sprinklers on and see what they are doing.

I have company in the morning and I don’t want a puddle here then.

I will check out the sprinklers.

It runs down the driveway. See this spot. That is not from rain. That is not a rain spot.

Let me show you how to shut the system off if there ever is a problem or when it rains.

Oh I won’t know how to do that. Oh I hear my oven timer. You’ll fix it for me won’t you Roberto?

Yes. Fine.

Roberto went back to the irrigation clock and turned on the three different stations that watered out along the drive. Two of the sprinkler heads were actually turned around and pointing in the wrong direction and were spraying out over the drive way. He wrapped his palm around those two heads and turned them back around to face the garden. There was a puddle by the front gate for the last week because the irrigation system was watering the driveway. That was easy to fix.

He went back to the clock and turned the big round knob to the position that said OFF. With all this rain the garden wouldn’t need any more water until he came back later in the week.

Mrs. Walters the sprinklers are all fixed.

That was fast. There was water running all down the drive and a puddle here every morning.

Yes some of the sprinkler heads were pointed in the wrong direction and were watering the driveway.

How did that happen?

I think it is because some people have trouble keeping their large cars on the driveway.

But you fixed it Rosario?

Yes Mrs. Walker I fixed it.


whistlestop caboose said...

I just had a very good laugh over this! It's raining in Switzerland, but I don't think we'll reach that same puddle crises stage :)

Christopher C. in Hawaii said...

Writing about it allows me to step back and chuckle about it as well. It helps to take some of the aaaa out of the Aaaargh!

As the blog title implies it is a compilation of persons and an embellishment of a very real reality.

Susan Harris said...

VERY good. I'm glad you linked to it on the Rant. Susan

Christopher C. in Hawaii said...

Glad you liked it.