Saturday, January 28, 2006

The Incident at the Bread Factory

“What in tar nation is goin on down ta the bread factory Vern?”

“Ain’t that somethin, BillyB? Them people are lookin pretty darn mad.”

“What’s done caused all that ruckus?”

Well BillyB from what I heard told, seems the boss had a good idea to promote his self. He figured he could make beer instead of bread. Same basic ingredients kinda and since it makes more money and folks cain’t never have too much beer he made a contest for getting his self some beer recipes.

He posted signs all up an down the interstates saying “America’s Voted Number One Beer All You Can Drink FREE!” “Submit your original recipe for making the best most affordable beer at this bread factory for a chance to win.” Now how was folks gonna pass that up. Here was a factory gonna make beer and if their special method won they was set for life. Everyone else would have a great new affordable beer to drink.

“Wow Vern, that sounds mighty fine. Shouldn’t them people be daincin instead?”

“They sure was excited at first BillyB, everybody talkin special recipes and runnin the factory and such. The recipes started pourin in faster and faster from all them people seein the signs on the interstate and nobody could keep up.”

Lots of folks though knew that the factory was gonna have ta upgrade and the polyticians was gonna need to make some laws bout this. Others thought about where the best ingredients was gonna come from and about the mess the factory might make. Even more was designin delivery trucks and thinking bout the workers. Takes more ta make beer then just a simple recipe and folks was givin their ideas and talkin to turn this whole factory around. They was promotin The Number One Beer after all, The Best Beer Ever. The factory needed to be made right too.

“Yep I guess that’s right Vern.”

So the boss took all them ideas for the factory and such and simple recipes for beer and never rejected a one of them as wrong headed or disqualyfied and sat with his thinkers for a spell to pick out the good ones. Then he announced his first sample was ready for folks to try.

“I see a bunch of kegs all lined up down there. They must be makin beer now Vern, but no one seems to be drinkin it. They’s all just yellin and shoutin.”

It show is a mess down there. My friend Yeager come up from there and told me that they ain’t gonna put much money in the factory or the ingredients or nothing else and all them kegs lined up down there is all Old Milwaukee beer with different logos stuck ta the sides. They’s wantin people to taste em and pick out which one of them is the best of the batch for the Best Beer in America prize.

“WOW! Ain’t that somethin. I guess folks was really expectin a great new beer.”

“What’s gonna happen now Vern?”

“We’ll just have ta wait an see BillyB. Maybe the factory will have ta stick to bread makin.”
(to be continued)

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